My parents are going to LOVE me.

It was a regular day in Advanced Algebra land. My teacher, furious as always, was going through her daily rounds of “YOU KIDS! IF YOU DON’T STOP TALKING THERE’LL BE A QUIZ!”

It was just then that I noticed… even roots in ratios in geometric sequences can be both positive and negative!

My teacher’s massive stomach, still heaving from her previous outburst, slowly came to a stop, as the expression on her face changed into an ominous grin.

“Jeffrey, please see me at my desk. Now.”

Most students in this situation would receieve gasps and other expressions of horror from the classmates around him. He was in for at least 3 days suspension, or even expulsion. Me, on the other hand – I don’t speak out much in class, so I’m considered the teachers’ pet, since when I do talk, it’s a correct, complex statement delving deeper into the subject we’re studying. So people just gave me dirty looks.

They were right in doing so, since my teacher had a surprise. Not enough people had signed up for Honors Pre-Calculus for next year, and

THERE YOU HAVE IT! I’ve been instantly admitted into Honors Pre-Calc without having to take any admission tests at all. When my parents hear the news, they’ll be sure to exclaim, “Jeffrey, we knew you could do it! Now about Chemistry. Get to studying. NOW.”

Annoying version:
OH MY GOD, THERE’S A URL IN MY UNDERWEAR.
Well my day pretty much kix0red. Started with everyone in the whole school seeing my sketch of WANG towering over the campus like some totalitarian leader. Seems he plastered up some signs of his own, spouting “got wang?” accompanied a picture of him with a milk moustache. I was just waiting the whole day for someone to draw a giant PENIS next to his mouth, destroying his whole advertising campaign. Heh. Maybe I’ll do that.
This stupid Russian kid in my Chemistry class, Ilya, keeps shooting “speetballss” at people (as he pronounces it). A few of my friends are going to drag his ass out after class and kick the living daylights out of him. Then we’ll shove the straw he uses up his… let’s continue.
After school finally ended, I was free to go wherever I pleased (having a car kicks everything’s ass), so I stopped off at the arcade for some DDR. Hell yes, I passed all six-footers. And the owner, being the great guy he is, treated me to a free game. Hell yes.
Well I believe I’ll make MIDIs for the rest of the day. I’ve got some damn serious catching up to do.

“No one cares” version:
I’ve learned to manage my time much more wisely recently. Considering the amounts of free time I have each day of the week, I’ve devised a corresponding schedule, provding adequate times for work and play. This way, my parents will have a greater appreciation of my initiative, and I won’t have to procrastinate, like I have in the past.
People around school have enjoyed some campaign posters I’ve made for my friend, John. He’s running for Senior Class President. Sharing these posters will earn me greater respect among my peers and superiors, enabling me to succeed socially and academically. I’m so glad that I can use my drawing talent for such a cause that will benefit my friends.
I’ve also decided to drink larger quantities of water, since I often find myself with a dry mouth. This will improve my performance in and out of class, as well as improve my physical shape, preparing me for a long summer of balanced activities, like jogging and internships.
Now I’ll complete my math assignment, which my teacher has begun to display online. Here is my school’s website, if in case you’re interested. See you later!

You-Go-Girl (YGG) Version:
OMG it was the besssssssst day today! ^_^ I drove to school in my cute lil’ car-car and I saw Ashley there and she was wearing such a cuuuute tank top with amazing heels! I was like “look at my website everyone” and they were sooooo amazed by it!! I think Brent smiled at me because of it!! (HE IS SUCH A HOTTIE) Jamie… you da’ girl! Your soooo good at track! OMG you should try out for the state competition or something! ^_^_^
I’m SUCH a good drawer. Joan is like so psyched about her president thingy and I made some cute drawings for him! OMG they’re sooo cute you HAVE to see them. It was like sooo cool to see everyone look at them and they’re saying stuff like “wow it looks just like [email protected] It’s amazing!” Amanda, I hope you winn also! Go team! ^_^
So I was drinking Evian (for my complexion – I need face lotion sooo bad, I think I’ll go to Claire’s :D) and Paulina and Marcia were all like “wanna go to the arcade?” And I said no, it’s too dorky! Geeky dweeb nerds go there! But they said that there’s a dancing game! ^_^ So seeing how I’m such a hip-hop angel, it was soo cool because the nice guy there liked me so he let me play more!! I hope daddy doesn’t find out because he’ll freak and get mad! :( But now I’m chatting on AIM with HipHopAngelDevill and Sk8erGod345 and they’re sooo nice. You should takl to them! They’re sooo nice.
Oh that’s the phone! I think Bebe is going to call about Brent! <3 <3 <3

Lamer Version:
stfu my day 0wned urs

Sunday was rather laid-back. Along with doing an SAT II practice test and all of my homework really early, I created a website for the chat room I frequent, #rpgcomics on irc.nightstar.net. I like the site design, but it doesn’t come up perfectly on Apple computers, or probably Netscape.

Check out the site here, and WATCH OUT FOR THOSE ADS! *crash*

I went for a real pixellated approach, so I used Silkscreen and Courier almost to a point of excess. But it’s fitting for something as simple as a chatroom. But even cooler, the whole website only has 4 documents. Although there are 7 buttons to different pages on the site, they actually just point to different locations on one page – and those locations are spread out horizontally, not vertically. Kicks a lot of ass, but still doesn’t look perfect on Apples.

Damn Mac users making it hard for designers. Soon Netscape 1.1 users will start to complain.

And just because my camera kicks so much ass, I have another photo gallery to present: Mario is Stoned presents (god I have to stop saying that) Jeffrey’s average day at school! By the way, because of the amazing flash capabilities of my camera, everyone I’ve shot looks really, really drunk.

My car – a 1991 Honda Accord LX. It kicks the ass.

Is even posting this picture legal?

The first picture-dodger of the day: this girl Ashley who all my friends follow around.

Evan, the artist, and Jeff, the pants enthusiast.

Evan gives the proper treatment to a frazzled Mike, who wears sunglasses indoors.

I often hang out with Jeff and 80’s Guy, who likes the 80’s and makes buttons, before and after school.

My choir gets ready to SING~! and Darren (left) smells something that I didn’t let out.

It’s break in the computer lab! I swing the camera towards Paul Chun and an angry computer lab supervisor, who advances to execute the final blow. (More Paul can be found here!)

James is at the computer… AS ALWAYS.

James shows off buttons he requested from 80’s Guy: “They misunderestimated me,” “I believe you have my stapler,” and “CANADA!”

Tiya, the resident anime artist, who should be drawing my comic right now. :P

DAMN! Mark Lee dodges the camera! I’ll get you yet! (More Mark Lee can be found here, here, and here.)

Bradx0r, the Canadian who enjoys Final Fantasy. James is interested in his sister.

Asya, who I’ve known for a while. Unfortunately, she hangs out with Felix the British Ladies’ Man, who intends to get her in the sack.

Mark leaves the lab. I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!

My school burns down! You can see Paul enjoying the fire drill in a white sweatshirt, Mark to the right of him avoiding the camera in a gray sweatshirt, and James and Steve (who needs no introduction) in the distance on the right.

Adam the Stoner declines to show his face. It’s all good.

Simeon informs me that what I’m doing is illegal.

An AWFUL turnout at my Japanese Animated Movie club. Chip, center, wants to give you cunnilingus.

I settle with a profile shot of Mark in Chemistry.

Good bye, Terra Linda… I’ll miss you…

It’s a busy Sat’day! It started off with the usual Japanese class. We learned how to say “I don’t like to scale buildings and shoot webs from my wrist with my friend Tanaka-san,” and I had pennies thrown at me by resident anime fans.

Those anime fans, along with Prinzess PMS, along with Batjew, along with Greg Dean, all went to Fanime 2002, whilst I was stuck in my Japanese class learning how to make katanas out of origami.

But I showed them! After Japanese, and a shot of Rockstar, I was off to the new arcade James and I had discovered on Fourth Street, downtown San Rafael. It’s called “Star Base 1,” and it recently celebrated its 20th birthday (hence the cheesy name). It’s got a hell of a lot of great games, including Tekken 4 and Tag, Aliens vs. Predator (Capcom), BAD DUDES VS. DRAGON NINJA (not), and of course, Dance Dance Revolution 4th Mix Plus!

For only 25 cents a dance (75 cents a game), James, his friend Hayato, and I danced our asses off for 2 hours straight. Amazingly enough, even though Hayato Wong is half Japanese and half Chinese (making the ULTIMATE ASIAN), James was even better than him at DDR. A picture gallery (mostly of James – bleah! :P) for your enjoyment:

Hayato and James start off.

Not sure what song it is, but according to the bar, they must really be sucking.

While Hayato is great, James is GODLY. Er, perfect.

James begins to break a sweat!

James goes wacky with the camera and shoots me playing “Have You Never Been Mellow” (not).

Trick! Yet again, while Hayato is “PERFECT!” James is “PERFECT!

“Duaaah… I step on the buttons.”

An amazing 4-step combo!

James, bathed in sweat, chooses from a million remixes of “Paranoia.”

Hayato takes a break, and learns to breathe again.

“He’s a MANIAC, MANIAC, on the pad.”

James’s lucky number.

My camera has a really fast shutter, but trust me: James is breaking the speed limit with his feet.

OH MY GOD, I’M PASSING ON TRICK.

James goes Double.

Wow. My camera, like, kicks a lot of ass.

Tee-hee… a 0-combo.

“ARE YOU A MONKEY?!?”

James starts off on Non-Stop Mode, has written a will.

A momentary rest between songs…

Sweaty backs are the style this month.

MOVE JAMES! FOR GREAT [email protected]~!~

The owner of the arcade, once a devious youth like us, adjusts the bass and does a little dance.
So that was like the best way EVER to spend a Saturday afternoon. After that, I was very uptight, and a shower was so relaxing! (I did it! A River City Ransom reference!)

I went with my mom to this church, where the “Field of Dogs,” and organization that owns a field… for dogs… had a meeting. My mom gave them some moneys because like all free organizations, they’re eternally financially strapped.

Then it was off to Dominican University, a nearby private school, to watch their orchestra and choir sing Mozart’s “Mass,” and “Requiem” by John… Sutter or something. There are too many composers out there named John.

OH MY GOD.

Talk about censorship in action. Some of my favorite songs are on this list. Imagine, Jumper, Chop Suey!… all on there. Wow.

And then there’s Project Censored, providing amazing stories from halted book signings to Daniel Pearl’s Israeli citizenship.

I think I’ve found out a whole lot more of America to complain about.

AND IF YOU ARE VISITOR 12222, PRINT SCREEN, SAVE IT, AND TELL ME. The counter is over to the left, below the main button bar.