Really different kind of day today.

The day started off with me titling the design of this site “OBEY,” because it is reminiscent of the Obey Giant. My drama/choir teacher wasn’t there, so for 2 periods we basically fooled around and accomplished nothing toward our final projects for the year. I got to play on my old crappy keyboard I brought to school. I actually turned in all of my required assignments for English, because my teacher wasn’t sadistic and didn’t add anything extra to the whiteboard at the last minute of class or anything.

Then came the big turning point – 4th period. The entire junior class was excused that period to go over to the gym, where we listened to all the candidates rant about how they’d accomplish EVERYTHING if they got elected to some stupid position like “Treasurer” or something. Now the problem with this was the choice for Senior Class President – only one candidate. It wasn’t always this way.

Now John Wang, my former Pokemon-type rival (while Ash and Gary fought with Pokemon, I fought John’s predisposition with Pokemon), had originally been running against Jena McRae, the other (winning) candidate. John is a genius when it comes to self-promotion. Garnering up the required self-esteem, John placed posters all around school, exclaiming “VOTE WANG,” followed by a random capture from a Pokemon episode, and some subtle sexual innuendo (like “A Bonafide Leader” or “Ask Not What Wang Can Do For You, But What You Can Do For Wang”). It was genius, and soon he was hailed thoughout the school, and it was almost a unanimous decision throughout the school that he would win. This is where John decided to take it one step further.

His next round of posters boasted “got Wang?” followed by a picture of him with a milk moustache, holding a Pikachu doll, and molesting random ferns placed throughout his house. He, along with some of his friends, even started wearing the famous Penny Arcadegot wang?” t-shirt. Seriously.

Seeing this, Mrs. Bader, the advisor of the Associated Student Body (ASB), went nuts. She disqualified John from the elections, and ensured Jena the role of Senior Class President. Well, people complained, even taking things to the point of accusations of racism because of the simple appearance of John’s last name in his advertising. A petition even went around (started by James), but to no avail.

Come election day, today, not everyone knew about the circumstances behind John’s getting pulled from the election. So when Jena finished her “victory” speech, a few kids got riled up and shouted “what about Wang?” Bader was probably ready for this, as she pulled the students from the gym and prevented them from voting. The period after the results were called, people walked out of their classrooms to find posters pasted throughout all of the halls, reading “MRS. BADER IS A FASCIST.” Scary, huh?

Well, come to think of it, the kid who put those posters up sounds right. Mrs. Bader disqualified an appropriate candidate, she deprived students of free speech AND the right to vote, and she discarded all Scantron ballots with “Wang” written in the margins. What a sorry state of affairs. I hope the message got to Mrs. Bader before the posters were torn down.

Oh, and also, the vice president I had supported lost also. He lost fair and square, but his advertising campaign was also really good. I actually designed the posters and stickers for him. His name’s Max Kuperman, so I just stuck his face on a bunch of pictures of Superman, and created a fancy title saying “SUPERMAN KUPERMAN!”

…And then I babysat kids and played Chrono Trigger with them for the whole evening. Fun fun fun!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *