I enjoy many kinds of mashed potatoes. The first thing I think about when I hear about mashed potatoes is how maybe cheese or butter would go great on it. The dining hall likes to serve weird stuff like “wasabi mashed potatoes” but I’m pretty sure that they just accidentally poured something in to their potato mix and decided to go with it. But to tell the truth I thhink the dining hall actually uses real potatoes, but still they’re probably leftovers of old meals that no one wanted. That’s usually the case with most of the stuff that’s in the dining hall. Same with the juice. The juice there is nice but it’s all made from syrup and combined with water and sometimes the water doesn’t come out and sometimes the juice doesn’t come out. I don’t like the fact that the only juice I’ve had here for the last 4 years is just some pulpy syrup shit that is mixed with water. I mean, it probably still has the same nutrients and everything but it makes it feel fake. I wonder when I get out of college if I’ll really enjoy food better once I start making it by myself, or if I’ll loko back at the dining hall and think I really had it good then. I think that’s how the majority of people will feel, but they obviously don’t feel it now. I guess it’s “cool” to hate college – what uou’ve been paying for the entire time. Tangent, I like the spelling errors I’ve done so far. Lik e” “uou” or “Lik e”” which I just wrote. When I write streams of consciousness like these I can only think about how I’m not supposed to think that this is a stream of consciousness and instead I should focus on getting all my thoughts out as soon as possible. But there’s always a part of me that is really self-conscious and thinking, hey, look, you’re tyrying your hardest to do something that you don’t usually do. Bleg anyway I’ve lost my train of thought, it’s time to talk about other things. I’m still thinking about FF4 DS and how it looks really nice and how I definitely plan on buying it. But god damn it my teacher said there’s only one more minute to writing this stream of consciousness so I feel as if I need to wrap things up, but obviously that’s not what’s happening in my brain because I’m constantly thinking about new things. I want to go back to my room to dick around on the Internet more but I can already do it here in class, that’s a big problem of mine. Okay that’s the end goodbye!
I hate it when people use the word cool in quotations “cool” just sounds like theyre disdainful of whats really an arbitrary and subjective term, like theyre making it objective and are bitter about not being inclusive in it or something. Thats actually kind of similar to a discussion I had with some friends about furries recently.. they mentioned it casuaully and i mentioned how i dislike furries and furrydom as a whole (especially the word and imagery behind ‘yiffing’) and they asked why i hated it and i said it was gross and they asked why i dont hate other things that i think are gross. It turned into a discussion that ultimately led to the conclusion that im sitll clinging to a sort of social hierarchy that i had at one time in my life given a lot of credebility, like how nerds are so far down the line but we made up subcategories so that other nerds could be even LOWER so we’re not at the bottom of the barrel… it was pretty interesting and kind of humbling, actually. We also got into a conversation about logic and applying logical laws to a rap song that had been playing earlier in the background, the “this is why im hot song.” He uses a logical fallacy, saying “im hot cause im fly, you aint cause you not” and i spent about 15 minutes elaborating on his use of the fallacy called “denying the antecedent” which makes an argument invalid. the argument goes kind of like this: if A makes B, then not A does NOT imply not B. like, if it rains the grass will be wet, but just because it doesnt rain doesnt mean the grass can be wet (sprinklers, dew, or drunken frat boys pissing on the lawn can all make grass wet). Not B, so not A is acceptable, then–if the grass isnt wet, then it couldnt have rained. then i realized i was applying scientific, logical arguments to a really terrible rap song and i stopped.
OK, that was five minutes… I’m assuming that’s how long you went for? That was kind of fun.
Hahaha! I have that self-consciousness thing, too. And I’m also really pleased to see spelling errors while typing quickly, that makes it so raw and stream-of-consciousnessy. 🙂
Alright I’m writing an essay right now but thinking about this sort of thing and stream of consciously is precisely the kind of thing I’m writing about right now well not entirely but I’ve been writing stream of consciousnessly about this kind of thing a lot recently and have been making interesting connections and sense out of things i’m quite exhausted and it’s 5 am at this point so it may not all come out how it otherwise would but everything plays itself out uniquely in life anyway so that concept is irrelevent. thinking about what you are doing while you are doing it removes yourself from the experience slightly. i’ve been doing it a lot lately and it’s been frustrating me, like having a conversation with somebody and not just having the conversation but thinking about it and other things and i guess the goal of a stream of concsciousness is to write yourself to the point of just writing without thinking because while fully engaged in thought one does nothing, but while fully engaged in an action one does not think but rather just does. really amazing things tend to happen when one gets caught up in doing and doing without stopping to consider it and it is frustrating to want to get to the point of just doing but thinking about getting to that point is no way to do it, one simply does it and in throwing themself into it catches themself off guard and will find that they’re able to keep doing it not really being entirely sure of where the inspiration for doing is coming from. is it wrong, then, to alternate between thinking and doing, or to think and do at the same time? no, while i’ve been tripping out on the fact that I’m either doing one or the other lately i’ve just recently realized that it’s a freeing concept, not a restraining one, in that one can learn to alternate between complete immersion in thought and in action. i’ve come to realize that inaction should not be written off and that in action IS an action in itself, in the seense that when one is not acting their choice to do so is effecting the situation, and that inaction is an action contained within itself (therefore not happening on the same level as normal action) and therefore a thought which then provides a point from which to leap into other action and really in the points where you stop to think like this one right now I just stopped to think for a second and now here I am contradicting myself you can think of it as black and white, as thinking and doing, as either just writing and writing or sitting back and thinking, but that’s just a restraining way to view it, it can be viewed as a spectrum, that as i’m writing this sometimes I’m thinking more and writing less, and at other times I’m just writing more and thinking less like at the beginning of your mashed potato thing you seemed to be aware of the fact that you were writing something out and started somewhere simple for the sake of writing it down but then by the end were spitting out whole real thoughts without being conscious enough of them to prevent yourself from doing it that was the point I wanted to make when I started this but I forgot what I was even doing for a second there
addendum and wow that was longer than I thought it would be:
the worst thought to have is wondering what you’re supposed to be doing or thinking you’re doing it wrong because it’s supposed to be done one way because nobody is supposed to be doing anything so we get the choice to do or think or anywhere in between and in doing we generally find justification for doing and in thinking we find justification for thinking and really i think the point is some people just keep going through their lives thinking they’re supposed to be doing something so they just look for the next thing they “should” do and keep doing and doing and never stop to think once then never ever get it and wonder what they did wrong, whereas others just sit and think and in thinking and thinking see no point in doing and will think about doing to the point of forgetting how to do more than think and really one just needs to maintain some sort of balance, to just be bold and go into things without thinking and to stop to think once in a while
i like to think of it as the third dimension of the physical and the fourth dimension of thought and intangibility and energy and here we are these happy little fifth dimensional things that exist somewhere between, beyond, and through the previous two dimensions
alright cool I needed that now I’m going back to writing an essay about how circular self referential thought can free you from intention and therefore provide a standpoint from which to view reality that is less subjective
stream of consciousness does not mean WALL OF TEXT
Thaaaaat’s Pirate, criticizing a stream of consciousness.