One thing that's really been pissing me off is the way the football coach teacher keeps telling the A) "white boy" beginners to and B) "white boys" playing on Maniac (uh, me, Jeff, and Levi) to freestyle.
"You're looking a little white today, Jeff--move your arms!"
What the shit kind of dance style do you expect from us, Mr. Doherty? Black? AzN? There's nothing worse than a white guy trying to act like one of those two ("Shut your hole, Wang-Chung!").
For one thing, if anyone has ever tried the game for the first time, it's hard enough for them to try and get half the arrows right, much less look like they're actually dancing. It takes at least a month to get good enough to pass a song on Maniac, much less start to get the hang of a decent, non-embarassing freestyle. We need to get this guy on the pads himself (if he doesn't break them) and see how difficult the game really is. I don't even think he can see the fuggin' TV screen half the time we play--he just sees the newer players, static on the pads, just playing the game by stepping.
If you're playing at least a seven footer, it's even worse, as the game forces you to hit more arrows--it restricts you to moving nothing but your feet. If you want to on Maniac, you can flail your arms and slide a little, but that's about it. Even AM-3P Maniac, my pick for the easiest 7 foot+ freestyle song, leaves little room to do more than (uber-cool) slides and that "handplant, 180 stomp, knee, knee, crouchstand" combo.
And he's going to say this every day we play. I'm about this close to ramming the football team's first-down marker up his ass. Or I'll have to learn to freestyle well (man, I don't want to be a one trick AM-3pony =|). Whichever comes first. You have no idea how hard it is for someone who looks like this to look good while dancing.
I can handle the entire TL football team walking in and laughing at Jeff and I playing Paranoia KCET on maniac (today), but when it gets to the teacher who's hosting the club...bleh. I know it's all in good fun and stupid outsider comments are expected and I take things too seriously (most of the club is comprised of white geeks such as myself, which is fine), but it's getting as repetitive as "WWW.Blondegirl." If he keeps badgering, I'm going to flat out tell him why most of us aren't moving our arms. It's a stupid arrow smashing dance simulator. Playing it does not mean you'll look like you're dancing at all. It takes months to look good. If there's anybody reading this who wants to (provided you have a fast connection), check these videos out and take notes.
In other DDR news, Indogutsu wrote up a indogut-busting (OMHAH) rendition of everyone's favorite unintelligible song, Hot Limit. Tim Horton's AND "Mole Time" references...I don't see how he does it. XD
| >> posted by CaptainCanada at 9/20/2002 03:10:52 PM |